Tag Archives: life-changing moments

A Year Has Passed

1 Oct

This is a rather momentous day for me, in that it’s my official one-year anniversary at my job! Yes, this time last year, I finally rid myself of the loathed “freelance” title and somehow managed to secure a spot as a full-time staffer. Gone were the angst-filled car rides and anxiety-laden conversations about “Where is my life going?” Actually…I still have that conversation everyday. Well, at least I can see a certified shrink about it with my company health benefits!

When I think about the sheer level of emotions I had before I got this job, it’s amazing I was able to get through the day without melting into a pile of neuroses and tears! The uncertainty of whether I would have a job or have to look for another one left me in a constant state of distress! Every decision I made seemed monumental, and led to many sleepless nights. By the middle of September, I was convinced I would never get rid of my eye bags or my throbbing ulcer!

But in the year that I’ve been working here full-time, it’s amazing to see the warm wave of stability that has washed over my life! Sure, I’m still filled with thoughts….so many thoughts. Life thoughts, work thoughts, hair thoughts, lunch thoughts…this brain refuses to quit! But without the weight of my over-dramatic world resting on my shoulders, life has gotten easier and I’m so much more carefree! I should celebrate by hugging my boss and getting a cupcake! …Maybe I’ll just stick with that last part if I’m invested in staying here until year two!


A Miracle Has Occurred

7 Sep

Ah, the end of the week! How is it possible that I’m already ready for a break? Obviously it’s going to take more than four days to get back into work mode–all of the motivation I had on Tuesday morning was promptly replaced Tuesday afternoon with the desire to go and eat an ice cream cone and vedge out in the sun. Of course, I did both of these things.

Despite the fact that this week was a bit of a let-down on several levels, my beachy vibes were scoring me compliments all over the place! My tan, my new dress–I was just basking in the glow of my own vanity!  And then–incredibly–someone complimented me on my hair. Yes. This actually happened.

Can we just ruminate on this for a second? SOMEONE GAVE ME A COMPLIMENT ON MY COIF. Usually, the only people who ever say anything nice about my hair are my sister, while trying to talk me off the ledge and wrangle the scissors out of my hand before I cut stress-bangs; and my mom, who really doesn’t have a choice. But this person was a coworker, someone who probably doesn’t have any idea the trauma and angst this head of hair has caused me. How were they to know this passing compliment would elevate my week from a crummy 4 to a solid 7?!

I have honestly considered taking another vacation, just so I can come back and get another compliment about my tresses. Seems a little extreme, yes, but that was a one-in-a-million opportunity! Literally….for the next one million years, I will not get another compliment like that. So…where are we headed???

The End of the Road

10 Apr

I took the bus home this weekend, and after my dad picked me up, we headed home. Pulling into the driveway, there were two things I remarked on: 1. That all the flowers were blooming and 2. That the two-ton scab that had sat outside my parents’ house for fifteen months–the broken-down, money-sucking hub of misery, Public Enemy #1 in my angst-filled, post-collegiate life–was gone, a shiny oil-slick from the leaking engine the only trace left that it had ever been there at all. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen: MY CAR IS GONE!

Despite my wishes it be pushed off the edge of a cliff, my parents took the more traditional route and put the car on Craigslist. Shockingly, someone actually bought it! I thought I was the only idiot that would fall for such a lemon, but apparently there is someone else either equally as desperate for a car, or equally as blinded by the irrationality of a recent graduate thrown into hell like I was. Ah, such good times.

That car was the last artifact of my rather rocky life before I moved into the city, and frankly, I will not mourn its loss in the slightest. However, if I must give it a memorial, I’ll resurrect the timeline from my first year of car ownership. But since it only goes through June, and I drove the car until November,  this timeline omits two new tires, a leaking oil pan, a shattered tail light, thirty parking tickets, a broken windshield wiper, and other various broken car parts that I don’t know the technical names for. Car, I will NOT miss you.

See the timeline here.

A Blaze(r) of Glory

10 Jan

I have been hunting for a black blazer for at least eight months. My old black blazer has a giant hole in the armpit and yet I still wore it obsessively–as long as I kept my arm by my side, no one would ever even notice! But since I’m in the never-ending clothing transition from college to working professional, I figured it was time to upgrade. How hard could it be? It’s a wardrobe staple, right?

Wrong, wrong, so very, very wrong! I have never had so much trouble finding a single article of clothing as I did with this stupid blazer. I am rarely in the mood to shop, but this blazer had turned me into a shopaholic! Since the summer, I was frequenting the mall at least once a week, an occurrence that was upped exponentially when I moved to the city. Lunch breaks, weeknights, Saturday afternoons, Sunday mornings–no time was off-limits, no store left un-blazed with my increasing fervor!

The fever-pitch to my madness happened between Christmas and New Years. Work was slow, and I decided one night to walk along 5th Avenue, where I knew there was an H&M. Then I could see the store windows and even take in the tree! Naturally, this was a surefire way to go completely insane. The sheer number of people walking along 5th Avenue and ducking into stores with their post-holiday sales was literally the most terrifying experience I’ve had since living here. My lunch must have been laced with drugs for me to have even entertained the notion that this would have been a  good idea! And yet there I was, pawing through clothing racks like a rabid animal, desperate for just one single sighting of cuff and lapel.

Making it out alive should have been enough, but I was devastated that I wasted a solid evening and once again came up empty. I resolved then and there to give up my search and stick to wearing my black cardigan, which was already wearing at the elbows from excessive use. I like to layer!

But then, last Friday. Glorious, marvelous, beautiful Friday! On an afternoon jaunt to the bank, I decided to do a quick scan of the Banana Republic next door, “just in case,” I unconvincingly convinced myself. And there,  surrounded by a halo of poly-cotton-silk blend perfection, was my new blazer! It was everything I dreamed it to be: black, with three buttons, sleeves with no holes, even a pocket! At this point, I didn’t care if the thing was dipped in black gold and cost ten million dollars–I was walking out with this blazer.

Thankfully, it was not ten million dollars, and even better, it was $10 off! I practically cried with relief and joy when I left the store, and then immediately starting texting all of my friends and relatives my exciting news! Now onto the hunt for that perfect pair of brown boots!

A Different Holiday Season

30 Dec

I’m two hours away from yet another lovely long weekend to celebrate New Years. This week was pretty awesome, considering that for most of it, it was just me and two or three other people! I left early, took nice afternoon walks, and finally got around to organizing the hell out of my desk! I cleaned and straightened and threw things away and stacked and copied and it looks amazing! And now I can leave work this afternoon through Monday with a clear head to enjoy the paid company holiday! Life is grand, isn’t it?

It’s hard to believe that just last year, I was gearing up to spend New Years Eve at work, after clocking in on both Christmas Eve and Christmas day! It’s hard to believe I even did that at all! It seems like a long time ago that I was sitting at my desk, reading the New York Times for 7 hours straight, sleeping through most of the family festivities and missing out on all the fun. I ended 2010 in a not-so-hopeful mood. I had traded a job I disliked for one I disliked even more, and was finding it difficult to find anything positive about life after college!

2011 has certainly been a roller coaster too, but with many more ups than downs! Looking back, I can’t even believe all the things that have happened this year–trips abroad, a dream job I adore, new friends, a new apartment, JOB SECURITY! Sure, there are still plenty of loose ends in my life, but it finally seems like things are ironing themselves out and have settled down. I’m looking forward to focusing on things in 2012 that don’t involve looking for a new job, stressing about whether I’ll keep said new job, and when I’ll finally be able to move out! All of that was accomplished this year, so I can benefit from the fruits of that labor and have some fun! 2012 will be the year I finally join that co-ed kickball team, I can feel it!

Happy New Year everyone!

Then and Now: A Commuting Comparison

4 Nov

I’ve been living in the city for six days so far, and it’s frankly amazing how much calmer I feel. This week has been really crazy with work, but without the stress and worry over commuting, my daily disposition has been pulled out of the gutter and into the heavens above!

Take for example, last Thursday night. You may have seen me crying in a dirty bus terminal after I realized I had left my car key in my jacket back at work, after waiting over an hour just to get on a bus. It took me almost four hours to get home when all was said and done, breaking my previous record of three and a half hours just that previous Monday!

This Thursday, however, I dawdled around work chatting with coworkers, then took a leisurely stroll to the subway and made it to my front door in less than a half hour! I made a nice dinner, listened to some jazz music, and wrote my poetic musings in my leather-bound moleskin. Ahem…well, slight exaggeration, but still! I actually had time to enjoy my evening. It’s been over a year and a half since I’ve spent my weeknights doing something other than eating microwaved hamburger casserole and going to bed at 10:45 PM.

My mornings have been lovely too. Let’s take a look back at this Monday, where I slept in until 8:30 am, made eggs and toast for breakfast, plugged in the curling iron (and actually used it…), and got to my office with ten minutes to spare before the morning meeting! Just a week before that, I was idling in absolute gridlock for an hour and a half because of an over-turned dump truck, almost got into a slap-fight with an idiot on the escalator at the Port Authority, and was two hours late for work. I could not make this stuff up, people, and yet that was my life, for A YEAR AND A HALF.

But now my life is filled with eggs and toast and morning walks and curled hair and hot dinners and jazz music at night and relaxing mornings and yoga before bed and arriving places on time and massive sighs of relief and IT’S ONLY THE FIRST WEEK!!

Apartment Hunt Part 2, Round 2…..SUCCESS!

31 Oct

Just a few weeks ago, I restarted my apartment hunt, and just last night, I moved in!

Yeaaahhhhh….life’s been a bit of a blur lately, and my apartment hunt was even more speedy–I looked at one place and signed the papers! Technically, this was the 14th place I had seen overall, if you count my ill-fated attempts with Mr. Smokestack  a few months ago. But the apartment is beautiful, naturally outside my price range, but not outrageously so, and the clincher: It’s 20 MINUTES FROM WORK. I don’t think I had admired the atomic clock on the stove for more than 15 seconds before I was signing the lease and whipping off certified checks like I had been born with a pen in my hand! The place just felt like mine though….the timing was right, the savings had been saved, and if I had to suffer through one more soul-crushing commute, I was literally going to kill someone. Times were dire, let me tell ya. Plus, did I mention it has a fireplace? A fireplace, people. I can’t get over it.

Of course, the second my brain was filled with apartment details, my work day was filled with insanity, and it’s been a crazy few weeks trying to find time to fit it all in. For the past two weeks, I’d been getting home at 9:30, scarfing down cereal, and then rushing down to an unheated basement to paint my old furniture. Then it was back up to my laptop to spend a ridiculous amount of time planning my bathroom color scheme, which never materialized, and picking a couch, which barely did….but more on that later.

So many more details to share, but now it’s time to hop on the subway and unlock my front door….all before 7 pm! I never thought I’d ever look forward to an evening commute, but it looks like there’s always room for change!